HI JUDE

Aforementioned Jude, or for the frankish, Zhood, being septentrional in her linguisticata, might better hear "hi" than "hey", which seems a more southerly salutation. And, of course, Liverpudlian. Which reminds me of a mock battle we played in the cornfields of Antietam, Jude and I...

Finding ourselves, one overcast autumnal afternoon, on a hill overlooking the bloodfields of Antietam, Jude -- a New Yorker -- and I -- a Carolinian -- had the novel notion of sneaking up on one another, in the cornfield, like we might have done a century and a half ago.

Approaching the cornfield (the bloodiest battle in the Civil War, claiming over 20,000 souls) I told Jude to close her eyes, and I would hide in the cornfield and wait for her.

Deviously, I raced to the edge of the cornfield instead, and peeked around, waiting for her to enter the field...at which point, I raced around and attacked her from the rear.

Well...that was, at least, the theory.

The reality was that I was wearing sandals. And when I charged her, full blast, and hit the strangely soft dirt of the cornfield...I immediately lost my footing, and for the 20 odd feet it took me to crashland, taking a wide swath of corn down with me, at a very unttractive angle I might add -- and Jude, whirling around in sheer horror at the sight and sound of my falling hard to the pop pop pop of the cornstalks also falling in much greater number...well...most satisfactory indeed!

My sides were splitting as i surveyed the fossil of our discovery, etched into the holy battlefield, where we bore witness to what was, and could have been.

Had our soldiers been dying of laughter, instead of muskets and bayonets...

Laughter is great medicine. It can even prevent and dissolve great wars. Humor is the oil of the world we need to be mining.